Tuesday, December 1, 2009

The fax-call saga


Monday
1:48 p.m.Return from lunch. Coworker warns me that someone's been trying to send a fax to our phone.
1:50 p.m.Answer phone. Hear screech of fax machine. Hang up.
1:51 p.m.Answer phone. Hear screech of fax machine. Hang up.
1:53 p.m.Answer phone. Hear screech of fax machine. Hang up.
2:00 p.m.Note fax-calls show up as "LINE 5 Transfer" on phone screen, and only come through on line 5.
2:02 p.m.Answer phone. Hear screech of fax machine. Hang up.
2:40 p.m.Attempt to leave fax-call on PARK. Fax-call disconnects and calls again.
2:51 p.m.Mistakenly blame random law firm for the fax-calls. Call them to complain. Hang up.
2:55 p.m.Answer phone. Hear screech of fax machine. Hang up.
3:30 p.m.Call random law firm to complain two more times. Begin to suspect it isn't them.
3:44 p.m.Take to pressing the line and the release with one hand, rather than picking up the phone each time.
3:57 p.m.Press Line 5. Hear screech of fax machine. Press release.
3:59 p.m.Press Line 5. Hear screech of fax machine. Press release.
4:00 p.m.Press Line 5. Hear screech of fax machine. Press release.
4:24 p.m.Begin tally to see how many fax-calls will occur within half an hour.
4:54 p.m.Twenty-five phone calls in thirty minutes -- that's approximately one fax-call every minutes and twelve seconds.



Tuesday
9:00 a.m.Note from office renter taped to phone: "Turn your phone ringer back on. I turned it off last night because the phone kept ringing and it was driving me crazy."
9:01 a.m.Press Line 5. Hear screech of fax machine. Press release.
9:03 a.m.Press Line 5. Hear screech of fax machine. Press release.
9:20 a.m.Attempt to forward all calls on line 5 to boardroom phone. Doesn't work.
9:25 a.m.Call phone company to try to block the number, except we don't know what number they're fax-calling us from. No help there.
9:54 a.m.Call company's phone system support guy. Press buttons for fifteen minutes. Phone system support guy says he'll come over.
10:25 a.m.Learn how to forward fax-call to fax machine. Fax-call connects to fax machine, but doesn't go through. Repeat several times. Give up.
10:39 a.m.Press Line 5. Hear screech of fax machine. Press release.
10:40 a.m.Attempt to forward fax-call to fax machine and have coworker manually accept it. Nothing.
10:42 a.m.Devise ingenious plan to identify offending fax-call number via fax transmission journal print-out. Foiled: confounded fax machine only shows successfully received faxes.
10:48 a.m.Press Line 5. Hear screech of fax machine. Press release.
10:49 a.m.Press Line 5. Hear screech of fax machine. Press release.
10:50 a.m.Press Line 5. Hear screech of fax machine. Press release.
10:53 a.m.Fantasize about what I would say to offending fax-caller if only I had their phone or fax number.
10:55 a.m.Coworker decides to use line 5 for her very long business call. Think warm, fuzzy thoughts about coworker.
11:12 a.m.Coworker hangs up. Fax-call saga resumes.
11:14 a.m.Press Line 5. Hear screech of fax machine. Press release.
11:15 a.m.Press Line 5. Hear screech of fax machine. Press release.
11:21 a.m.Attempt to leave the boardroom phone off the hook, on line 5. Doesn't work.
11:22 a.m.Press Line 5. Hear screech of fax machine. Press release.
11:23 a.m.Forget how I calculated one fax-call every one minute and twelve seconds. Unable to get ahold of nerdy husband. Call sister instead. Yes, one minute and twelve seconds is correct.
11:30 a.m.Press Line 5. Hear screech of fax machine. Press release.
11:32 a.m.Press Line 5. Hear screech of fax machine. Press release.
11:45 a.m.Phone system support guy arrives and diagnoses the problem as a modem that has mistakenly been programmed to continually dial our number. He transfers the calls to our fax machine.
12:06 a.m.Fax machine rings faintly every minute and twelve seconds -- music to my ears (comparatively).





Photo by Deman



Keeping this log of the fax-call saga helped me maintain my sense of humour in an otherwise frustrating situation. How do you deal with totally annoying, frustrating crap like this?

3 comments:

Dorkmaster Flek said...

Oh, so that's why you were calling me this morning. :) Eventually, in situations like those, I give up and start laughing.

dogimo said...

On the second attempt, I hit 'transfer', dialed 9 (to get out)+our-fax-number, and hit 'transfer' again. Then I walked out to the copy room (where the fax is) and took the culprit as it came off the fax machine. Then I went back to my desk and phoned the moron responsible.

As I understand it, a lot of office phones aren't configured to be able to transfer to an external line. But I lucked out, or else, I'm special!

Mary said...

Hahaha oh man that suuuuccckkks. It would have driven me nuts! Well for me, the past two days my co-workers were at a trade show leaving me to handle gift card land myself. This wouldn't be an issue usually however it's the first week of December and everyone is going ape shit for gift cards. The phone just wouldn't stop, I wanted to chuck it across the room. There came a point where at 2, I finally sat down to eat... the phone would ring and just said fuck it, I'm not answering. This person proceeded to hang up and try 5 more times in a row. So I still didn't answer, but this time it was out of spite. They didn't leave a message so it couldn't have been that important, haha. Anyway, bottom line is my work makes me hate Christmas time. My entire December Christmas excitement is ruined because of the stress of my day. However once the 24th hits, the calls stop and I can breeze through the rest of the winter. Ugh... I hate work right now.