Friday, November 27, 2009

The rice cooker

The rice cooker gives a pompous lecture
on efficient design, his glass hat hopping up
off his head with each fervent bullet-point.
A background murmur of percolation indicates cogitation.
Soon his mind will fog with tangents of thick steam
and he'll have to start the whole thing over.

He fancies himself mighty important
with his brand name label and stainless
steel finish, but he doesn't know
the plainer appliances snicker
and call him stout
behind his back.

Yes, I realize these are not rice cookers. Keep reading.

        I have a habit of ascribing personalities to inanimate objects. It's fun. What kind of personalities do you think the three toasters in the image above might have?


stomachlinernotes said...

The first one has the unwavering disposition of an English guard. You could poke and prod at it all day long, but any attempt at getting it to do anything but it's job - to toast - would be futile.

The second one is more of a playful character. It doesn't let what it does for a living interfere or negatively affect its attitude. There's more to life than work, and there's no one better to lead by example than a polka dot toaster.

The last one is a stainless steel toaster.

dogimo said...

Red fancies itself a swing-ska hipster with a sense of humor and retro style. Red drives a 1963 Ford Galaxie, cherry red with chrome trim.

Sleek Steely is efficient and no-nonsense, but terribly sensitive on the inside. Trapped into a role of always being the precise and dependable one, Sleek Steely wishes others would open up and confide more, but fears that they will always be too intimidated to do so. SS drives a 2004 Mercedes-Benz SLK 200 Kompressor - silver with a hint of cool teal.

Polka Bullseye believes equally in fate, karma and chaos theory, disbelieves in objectivity, likes short walks on the beach and drives a custom '73 VW Bug with an identical paint job.

Shannon Teresa said...

The goverment worker, the CEO and the stoner!

Claudia said...

Stainless steel - badass like Gill from Finding Nemo.

Red - kind of fat and comforting like a housekeeper. Like Mrs Potts from Beauty and the Beast.

Dot is totally happy go lucky. :)