Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Andrew has a thing for vacuum cleaners

He likes physics and machines.
As a child, he would ask
to see the household vacuum upon entrance
into the homes of friends and family.
He would flee from his frightened mother
in department stores, only to be found
over in Appliances, bowing to
roaring, sucking beasts
like golden idols.

Now, the proud owner
of a house that comes complete
with cobwebs, cat hair, dust bunnies,
Andrew wields his Dyson like the Sword of Peleus.
Drunk on wine and a HEPA filtration system
he vrooms like a child behind a steering wheel,
laughs with storybook victory, proclaims
to the accursed dust that its days
are numbered

and I, like a good sport, just smile
and point out new enemy territory.


Dorkmaster Flek said...

Whatever, you love a good cleaning as much as I do. That thing sucks hard! In a good way. :)

Anonymous said...

You're quite welcome!
And yes I do write. I've posted a few poems but I'm skeptical about posting a lot on them on here. Maybe after I get published.

alexis said...

see it as no more centipedes. i hate to admit it but i'm kinda excited to come over to see your new dyson

Mary said...

hey man, i get it too. there's nothing worse than a vacuum that doesn't do it's job and catch every single speck of nasty on your floor.

I'm no clean freak myself, but when I get into cleaning moods, I want my appliances to work dangit! i'm excited for you!

Claudia said...

I know exactly what he is talking about. Vacuuming is definitely my favourite cleaning chore to do.... I love the way dirt just disappears!

I'm totally renewing my membership to the Andrew Fan Club.