Monday, August 17, 2009

bachelorette party

my bridesmaids are blowing up hot pink balloons
while I prepare Pin the Dick on the Hunk        sketching
a greasy-looking man with a handle ball mustache
thick black marker on blue Bristol board
taking as my models the naked men on these

sleazy 1990s playing cards
add a new level to this drinking game
new rule: every time the man on your card
shows butt crack, you must drink
new rule: every time the man on your card
is wearing clothes, you must drink
new rule: every time the man on your card
doesn’t look into your eyes, you

must drink the whole shot, even when it burns
because Stranger James bought it for me
at the bar where my friends are scavenger hunting
and the next morning I will find photographs of
strange penises and unfamiliar boxers
hanging off my curtain rod, swaying back

and forth across the front stage, dancing to songs
our parents grew up with        our cheeks flushed with
alcohol, aerobic exercise, the heat of a crowded room
I can’t breathe but stopping is not an option
even after the music cuts and the bar closes
and we’re walking east along Bloor, still drunk enough
to crave hotdogs from 7-Eleven.


Dorkmaster Flek said...

Exercise works better than I thought for preventing a hangover. I'm amazed you were fine the next morning. :)

Mary said...

super awesome night!!! we need more dancing in our lives.

Alex James said...

Sounds like quite the time. I'm running a bachelor party in a couple of weeks, but I doubt I'll have a very good time being as I have to keep the drunken mob in some semblance of order and ensure the groom-to-be is returned in more or less the same condition in which he left (i.e. no broken bones, no lipstick in untoward places, etc.) Sigh. It's a full-time job, I'm sure.

Stylistically, I really liked this. Captured a lot of that frenetic, hazy energy you get on nights like that. Write on (gah, did I actually just type that? Apparently I'm either genetically drunk or not quite awake yet.)

alexis said...

i had the best time ever too. i guess the next big dance party will be you & andrew's big day, can't wait!!