Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Today I miss university


The bookkeeper calls me into her office
And I dawdle on my way,
Thinking, “Oh God,
What have I done now?”
She asks me straightforward questions
And I make a lot of thinking sounds,
Looking stupid, as usual,
Until she sucks the air in coldly through her teeth,
Realizing that I’ve somehow managed
To mess things up more than usual this week.
I apologize profusely, sincerely,
Thinking, “I’m so good
At not making the same mistake twice.
Now if I could just stop fucking up to begin with.”

I want to drag in my old university papers,
Report cards,
I.Q. tests,
Some way to prove
I’m not the idiot I keep acting like,
That it’s the job that makes me stupid,
No ways to show off in typing and banking,
Just plenty of ways to make mistakes.

Today I miss essays and exams,
Classroom discussions,
A world where even a hundred silly little errors
Couldn’t hide my intellect.

1 comment:

Urban Folk said...

When I initially read the phrase "today I miss university" I was ready to respond with "really? I seriously don't". But after what you said I understand exactly how you feel. Having done a lot of similar jobs in my life, I know what it's like to be misinterpreted as a moron for doing something wrong even though you're probably smarter than everyone in the building. My suggestion? Get a job that highlights your skills! Granted you may have to take a serious pay cut (I make next-to-nothing at my job) but at least you'll be appreciated for your skills and innate talents, rather than being castigated for your lack of knowledge that doesn't really matter to anyone outside that job anyway. ;)